Uncle Mike’s Ramblings: Nicknames
“What’s in a name? That which we call a rose
By any other name would smell as sweet.”
William Shakespeare, even though he might be the greatest writer who ever lived, was obviously not an e-wrestler. It’s obvious not just because he didn’t have internet access, but because he dismisses the importance of a name. In the game of ewrestling, there’s a lot in a name. But more specifically, there’s a lot in a nickname.
In the interest of full disclosure, I love nicknames. I find they’re incredibly useful in writing, mainly in narration passages. At one point, my character had fourteen nicknames that were in active use… some bestowed by other players, some by the announcers on the cards, and a few I just flat-out made up. And, in a beautiful turn of events, eventually the number of nicknames became both a running gag and a source for yet another nickname: “The Man of 1001 Nicknames.” It gave my opponents something to attack, bringing up low self-esteem, or an inflated ego. It gave me a way to refer to my character during narration without repeating the same words over and over, and it gave the card writer a way to talk about the character without using the name over and over. Being able to toss in “The History Maker” or “The Extreme Millennium Man” or “BACW’s Icon” lets the reader know who is being talked about without seeing Snake Eyes fifty times, which can become a little grating.
So what makes a good nickname? Obviously everyone’s going to have a different opinion. Personally, I like nicknames with some punch- a nickname that gives you everything you need to know about the character. For example, one of my favorite characters used the moniker “The Mile High Monster.” Just from those four words, you get a snapshot of the character- he’s from Denver, Colorado. He’s a big guy, with a power style, maybe a little on the evil side. Another character used “The Ambassador.” This was the perfect nickname for the character, who was a peaceful type, trying to bring people together rather than drive them apart, liked by everyone, even his opponents.
Another aspect of a nickname I look for is memorability- which isn’t a word, but damned sure should be.. Sure, you can call yourself “The Icon” or “The Showstopper,” but we’ve heard it before. The odds of remembering it are pretty slim. I once was in a federation with a guy who used the nickname “Maelstrom.” Again, just by the nickname you get an idea of the character- always in turmoil, restless, shifty. Maybe a bit of an intellectual, since it’s not really a common word. I didn’t particularly like the character, and it’s been nine years since I’ve seen a roleplay by them, but I still remember the nickname. Another from the same time period was “The Rouge Rogue.” I don’t remember anything about the character, really- or even the character’s main name- but I still think of the nickname. The nickname was memorable enough that it stuck long after the character has fallen away.
Working a nickname into your character’s main name can be a little bit of a risk. The biggest problem, for me at least, is I need the character to have a decent name without the nickname. Sometimes it works out- “Absolute” Lee Riel was memorable, and even without the “Absolute” it’s an acceptable name for a character. Another example of a time it worked out was Jeremy “The White” Knyte. Again, Jeremy Knyte is a perfectly acceptable wrestler name, and being able to work “The White” in is just gravy.
And then there are bad nicknames… which, usually, are pretty memorable. For example, there was a character who referred to himself regularly as the “Two Hundred Ton Eighteen Wheeler on Crack.” There are so many problems with that nickname it’s not even funny- for one thing, a two hundred ton eighteen wheeler would make a huge mess of the road. It’d also require all the gas in the world to go thirty feet or so. And machines usually don’t use crack. Let’s not forget that describing yourself as “on crack” is usually not considered a positive thing. That’s a bad nickname- one that you do not want to saddle yourself with.
But the king of “bad nicknames” comes from someone who was a really nice guy, but not particularly bright. This nickname alone gave me dozens of hours of entertainment, just giggling away at the incredibly stupidity. Here it is: “The Superior Mastodon.”
Let it wash over you.
Ok, so technically “mastodon” can be used to describe a person of great power… but to steal from George Carlin, there’s a reason it’s the second definition in the dictionary and not the first: it’s wrong. A mastodon is a hairy dinosaur, and that’s that. So this person was regularly saying he was a better than average dinosaur. What’s in a name? If your name is “The Superior Mastodon,” a lot of mocking.
Mike “Cavs” Cavenaugh is a writer for WeWA.org, presenting his random mind drops every Wednesday. He can be reached for questions and comments at mcc@wewa.org.
